Bourdaingerous
Tonight I saw “Roadrunner,” the Anthony Bourdain documentary. Tonight I also learned that Tony told people his favorite music was the Curtis Mayfield soundtrack to “Superfly,” which I also wholeheartedly enjoy and count among my all-time faves, especially while languishing in a bathtub, but that his actual favorite song, according to artist and general fuckin’ troublemaker David Choe, was the song “Anemone” by the Brian Jonestown Massacre, WHICH IS ALSO MY FAVORITE SONG. Except this song has only been my favorite song for maybe a year or two, after his death. And it was released 25 years ago. And Tony and I are exactly 24 years apart.
What. Is. Happening?!
Choe called this “heroin music” and used it to explain Tony’s darkness lingering below the surface. But I disagree. This is SENSUAL music. Sure, people who like heroin like this music, because they are sensual people. In the documentary, Tony’s friends and producers talked about him overcoming his heroin addiction and just channeling his addictive personality into something else, citing jiu jitsu as the “something else” in question, completely ignoring that the entire pursuit of food and drink is a sensual pursuit and something worth being addicted to.
Listen. Did I sneak my own REI-brand 32-ounce bottle of red wine into the theater tonight? Shhh. Don’t worry your pretty little head about it, baby. It ain’t your concern.
Anthony Bourdain and I were both born on June 25, in the year of the Monkey. If you would like a primer on our personalities, just read this bunch of online bullshit, which is completely accurate:
This is one of the most contradictory signs in the Primal Zodiac. Those born under the sign of Emperor Tamarin represent themselves as fun, carefree, smart, and caring, and while they do indeed share these traits they also mask a dark side full of arrogance, self-doubt, and judgment for others. They truly do not have bad intentions, but members of this sign tend to be emotionally immature, and prefer to live in a fantasy world rather than share their true thoughts and feelings.
Emperor Tamarins are very smart and intuitive. They are truly capable of doing anything, and each one has its own unique set of skills that, when focused, can take them far. Too often though this sign has a tendency toward depression and negative thinking and entertains himself or herself by ridiculing the stupidity of the general population. They don’t consider this rude, though, because they truly are more intelligent than most people. They are also very creative and surprisingly artistic. Despite all this they are truly insecure and have fragile egos. Emperor Tamarins may have a light-hearted exterior but inside they are afraid of being rejected by those they care about, so they prefer not to care about anyone or anything too strongly.
H…hi.
Also, apparently Chris Isaak is exactly one day younger than Tony. What a wicked game we play!
Shit, is this supposed to be a review of Roadrunner? Ok.
Old photos of Tony: Good
Old footage of Tony: Great
Stories about his first wife: Excellent, didn’t even really realize she existed aside from a casual mention of a past marriage in Medium Raw.
Stories about his baby mama, Ottavia, aka Italian lady #1: Also excellent, definitely did not feel like she wanted to jiu jitsu the hell out of everyone the whole time, and her interview footage was great. A+ crazy lady I’d love to hang out with.
Stories about Asia Argento, aka Italian lady #2: This is where people started to splinter off in terms of whether they found it enjoyable or helpful or what. It was like, did he kill himself because paparazzi snapped photos of her with some other dude? Did he kill himself because after her whole incredibly public Harvey Weinstein #MeToo thing, she was accused of taking advantage of an underage male costar years earlier? We’re going to say he killed himself because he just wanted to kill himself, but we’re going to start scratching at this surface for funzies.
Nobody promised this would be linear. In short, some quick lessons:
It is entirely possible to sneak your own alcohol into the theater
Go see Roadrunner
I should probably have my sister edit this tomorrow.
Nah.
